Mid-Board Exam Studying Break

It's been a while. And I shouldn't even be doing this. But because of my 1 faithful reader (and how much I love her) I will post in the midst of STEP 1 studying. Today marks my halfway point with my exam on the 17th. EEK!

But of course, I'm already planning for the fun that's coming after it. I think with all this oppressed living my classmates and I are going through (ie. sitting at a desk for 12-13 hours all day everyday... I didn't even realize it was Memorial Day this past weekend), all I want to do is let loose and go wild. Ok, so by "go wild," I really just mean decadent foods and endless shopping... Come on, what else?

I have plans to go to NYC for the 10 or so days I have left before I begin my orientations for 3rd year. Obviously, we go a lot, but this time, I want to be an ambitious tourist! These are the tentative plans I have. I probably won't get to them all, but I really plan on living it up while I'm there! Daybee, you're joining me!

1. My old Verameat ring that I loved so much broke a few months ago! So I'm looking to replace it. This Steven Alan one is the top contender and I want to go look at it in person. I would also be unopposed to going to Catbird in Brooklyn too.
   
2. Also in Brooklyn, I want to stop by Four and Twenty Blackbirds for a slice of their famous key lime pie, Dough for a crazy(awesome)-sounding donuts, fancy cocktails at the Ides, and a walk along the Brooklyn Heights promenade. I used to take lessons just a couple blocks away from a violinist who, decades ago, sold a violin that made enough money for his brownstone.
3. Obviously the Rain Room at the MoMa that everyone keeps raving about. Or the Cloisters, the Met Rooftop... frankly, any museum would do too.
4. Cookies from Levain and Momofuku's Milk Bar.
5. This may be a stretch, but go see Wicked. I think I'm the only person left on earth who hasn't seen this yet. My sister better come if I go...
6. If not Broadway, I'd be totally down for Swan Lake at Lincoln Center!
7. Over the weekend, check out the Chelsea Flea Market or the Brooklyn Flea Markets.
8. Restaurants, restaurants, more restaurants. And don't even get me started on the Asian foods (and the bubble teas and ice cream that we've been enjoying since childhood).
9. I won't have a bicycle, but doesn't this Cup of Jo Bikeride Guide sound so awesome? Maybe I could walk bits of it...
10. Just walking through Central Park, Battery Park (my cousins live right by it!), so many pretty neighborhoods...

Yowza, this is ambitious. I definitely won't be getting to all of these, but even if I just get half, I'd be thrilled. I better pack my comfiest walking shoes! Daydreaming of post-board exam life... But now, back to work.

Joy by Zadie Smith

Read this essay by Zadie Smith discussing the difference between pleasure and joy:

"Occasionally the child, too, is a pleasure, though mostly she is a joy, which means in fact she gives us not much pleasure at all, but rather that strange admixture of terror, pain, and delight that I have come to recognize as joy"

(photo via weheartit)

C'est La Vie

So I found out this morning that I'm doing clinical rotations at Oakwood Hospital next year. Though it isn't what I wanted, there are definitely some good things about training at this site. This is me trying to be nonchalantly unaffected and positive... And it's a lot like how I'm dealing with the impending snow storm by looking at this photo from a warm and clear yesterday.

On Winter, Oranges, and a Belated Birthday

I once wrote an essay about my sister and oranges and winter. In it, I recalled afternoons from the one year we overlapped in high school and how I was afraid that maybe we'd never again be able to share the same intertwining lives we did at that time. Fast forward almost 10 years (!!!), and here we are still. Now it's not just oranges that bond us together, but so, so much more. I am and will always be forever grateful.

Sorry this is so late, but happy birthday to my sister!

(photo via weheartit)

Happy 2013... belated

A long delay in posting for this new year... The end of 2012 was really good with my trip to Nicaragua. I have plenty to update on that, hopefully soon. At least I'll have a link to the school blog I was working on while I was down there. But when I got back home, I fell sick and remained so while in NYC between Christmas and New Years... and then stayed sick for about 2 weeks into 2013. I think that definitely was a factor in how difficult I found the Cardio unit - I was playing catch-up the whole time but I've just managed to scrape by.

Anyway, more to come soon! In the meantime, it's likely that you a saw this already. But it is just so cute, I can't help myself...

"We got work to do. We can cry about it or we can dance about it.... Everybody's good to give the world a reason to dance."

Almost there...

While I'm still toiling away for my Respiratory Pathophysiology exam tomorrow, the blog was introduced. Just some extra motivation to maintain the grind. Break and Nicaragua will be here soon enough.

Dénouement

It's been such a chaotic week with crazy highs and crazy lows - I'm sure you know what kind of week I'm talking about. Anyway, there have been some scary things going on with a good friend and I've been having a really hard time with some extra-curriculars at school that will be culminating in 2 big concerts within the next 4 days. And then exams in 3 days after that. And then my week-long medical trip to Nicaragua in 2 days after that (oh, I never told you guys about that? Oops.) It felt like I had to single-handedly shoulder a lot of the burdens. Especially earlier in the week, I was feeling quite lonely, overwhelmed, and helpless. Tonight when I left school at 10pm, I was still feeling weak and sorry for myself.

The thing is, life stops for no one. The light drizzle became heavy rain during my drive home. The holiday radio station that usually provides familiarity and comfort was overbearing in its cheer. Sometimes, people and things that you want to count on will disappoint you. And somehow, through all the confusion and hurt, there is a fittingly gentle yet undeniably clear sign that things have changed. For good. I have answers. No more wondering. No more feeling sorry. No more looking back with such longing. Life moves on and I need to too.

Anyway, I got home and was cleaning out some old emails, all mopey and sad (do any of you also feel the compulsive need to purge and expunge yourself of distracting clutter after a really terrible day? That feeling that you need to seriously clean up and re-examine your life?). But then I came across some old emails that I sent out and replies that I received while I was in Peru for a month in 2008. Emails to and from some of my closest friends. Reading them made me so delightfully happy! I've actually just agreed to blog for my school during my Nicaragua trip and so these emails were found in perfect timing too. There are so many happy, thoughtful, sentimental, and true moments in those emails. And some really special discoveries that really pulled me towards the road I now travel.

In dramatic art forms like drama and film, the good story lines will always follow what pedagogues call "the dramatic arc": exposition, rising action, climax, falling action, and resolution/dénouement. But real life doesn't always follow such a convenient pattern, does it? I guess that's the whole beauty of experience. It's just extra encouraging when life does that funny thing of giving you exactly what you need to help you to get by during those sad moments, you know? I hope you're coming across some of these similarly perfect findings amidst your own chaos (if you're having any) too.

(top photo of pensive me in Puno by the JJB, 2nd photo of a boat ride to the floating Uros islands, last photo of Cusco's central square)